LA

Well, after leaving houston at 6 am, I arrived in los angeles at 1 pm. I made it near phoenix, az the first night (nearly 14 hours of driving) and ended up falling asleep at a truck stop--which was probably the scariest night of my life.

During the course of the trip:
I hit a bird and saw it bounce off my car and hit the pavement
I saw about 3.5 deer, dead on the road.
I got pulled over near san antonio for going 51 in a 45, but got off with a warning (I kissed ass like never before)
I saw a 2 terrible wrecks, one in which a truck was flipped on its side.
I saw a wind farm for the first time (pic below)
I ceremoniously flicked off san antonio as I drove though.
I ate 3.5 rolls of kimbapI
drank about 260 oz of water, 1 roll of sour chewy sweet tarts, and 2 red bulls.I drove through 3 immigrations/customs check points.
I listened to speed metal and gangsta rap nearly the entire trip.
I slept and rested a total of about 5 hours.I think I also filled up my tank 4 times, the most expensive gas being in CA @ $4.09/gallon of the crappy gas.
In the past two days, I've consumed nearly 4000% of my daily recommended dosage of vitamin B.

There are these mini-beverages you can get from the corner store like 5 Hour Energy, which essentially work like redbull without the caffeine crash.If you take highway 60 to LA from i-10, the road is like a car commerical, full of s-turns and mountains. Unfortunately, my honda accord doesn't perform like a porsche.Thanks to everyone who checked on my progress during the trip.Arizona smells like poo. Here are some panoramic photos I took while on the way. they're huge (up to 16 glorious mb), so it may take a minute to load.

https://webspace.utexas.edu/jk228/pano/Untitled-1.jpg?uniq=-4ojahkhttps://webspace.utexas.edu/jk228/pano/pano7.jpg?uniq=-4ojahfhttps://webspace.utexas.edu/jk228/pano/pano4.jpg?uniq=-4ojahahttps://webspace.utexas.edu/jk228/pano/pano3.jpg?uniq=-4ojah5https://webspace.utexas.edu/jk228/pano/pano2.jpg?uniq=-4ojah0https://webspace.utexas.edu/jk228/pano/pano.jpg?uniq=-4ojagv

I got into town and had tofu in k-town. It still hasn't sunk in that i've moved or that I'm starting over, or that my family isn't as close as they used to be.

moobies

To the list:
1. A Bronx Tale (BAD TO THE ASS)
2. Once Upon a Time in America (i fell asleep)
3. City of Violence
4. Cocaine Cowboys

time flies by

Since the last day of classes, life has been a rush.

I spent a couple days vegging out and watching tv before I got back on my grizzy. I threw my first and only show in college at Karma Lounge with some friends. It was pretty fun, sans the mixing which took a good 14 hours the day before. I don't know if you've ever heard the same 12 songs for 14 hours, but it will make a man go crazy. By the end of the night, i was in a rage from having to mix down different parts over and over again. Honestly, I'm still burnt out. I only want to work on my own shit now--mostly since I have low standards for the mixing quality of my own shit. That and I think rapping is easier to mix than singing. Either way, a bunch of people showed up, the sets were live, and we had a good time.

I had a hard time sleeping last week because of graduation. The uncertainty finally sank in, the very idea that i dont know what the fuck i'm doing with myself. Graduation weekend passed, with your boy intoxicated in several ways. It was pretty fun and a bit relaxing. I thought things would wind down, and that I'd have some time to get my shit together before heading back to houston. Tuesday I ended up talking to the company I applied for, and it turns out they had some spots available. Unfortunately, they wanted to interview me in person, and I got scared that someone else would seem more qualified because they were more available. Homie don't play that shit. Seriously, more qualified than.. me?

So tuesday to thursday, I slept somewhere between 4 and 6 am. The fridge was a BEAST to clean. Packing sucked. I had a hard time sleeping. Somehow, I got it all taken care of, and got to houston today.

Friday, I'd like to keep things chill before I hit the road on saturday for a good 20+ hours--which I imagine to be the most hellacious driving I will ever have the misery of enduring. Maybe i'll have a fun time taking pictures and sheeeeit.

Looking back at college, I don't know what to think. I don't know how to calculate the sum of good and bad. I don't know what it has made of me, or if I'm who I'd like to be. when I think of it, it's as if every blessing came with a curse. The friends I made through church are incredible people, but I feel like I wasted years attending. The girls I pursued all pretty much stomped me down with high heels. I spend a lot less time sober, YAY!. I spend a lot less time sober, OH GNOES! I have few friends to show for the college experience, but my music was starting to pop off. It's all balanced in some cheesy karmic way.

I don't know why I added this to the post.

West Coast, I see you.

anatomy of a BITCH: a tale of epic win

Sorry it's so long, but it was an EPIC evening.

So, yesterday I went to campus at 11 in the morning and left at 5 in the morning the next day. My group was working on a huge project, something we'd been working on all semester, and we were presenting today. This class, from 11-12:30, also required our attendance from 5-8, since we had to watch all the teams present. We had all busted our asses working on this project, and were going to present to the CEO of a startup.

One of the groups that had presented first started drinking during the night-time presentations, joking around, asking asshole questions, and pretty much just acting like some asses. They were pretty blitzed mid-way through the presentations, and it had become clear they were drinking--even though howard didn't believe me.

I should take a brief moment to introduce the detail of one of the drunkards being a hoe (many of them are, well.. all of them are after this project), and I'd like to use Jay-Z's definition:

"This is not a hoe in the sense of having a pussy
But a pussy having no God damn sense, try and push me"
- 99 problems

This asshole asks the same damn question to every marketing group after they present. "uh... don't you think that you'll dilute the brand by.. [insert presenting teams platform here]?"

seriously, bitch. what do you know about anything? I've forgotten more about marketing than you've ever thought about marketing. I don't even know that much. No one in the class likes you except for the wretched gang of sea creatures you call a group. You've never contributed to class, or even mankind for that matter. Strongly consider other options.

Anyways, I became suspicious when they started laughing at one of my group members present. I wasn't having that at all. Then when they tried to tag-team another group by poking holes in their presentation, that was the last straw. Your half-assed project wasn't fooling anyone. We had also seen them share the same coke bottle, which doesn't make sense when you have four bottles.

So upon the recommendation of my peers, I told the professor that we were suspicious of their sobriety. We found the empty coke bottles they had mixed their rum into, howard said he heard them say rum, adelle said she could smell it, and kelly said she also did when they spilled it on her. I told the professor I took mad disrespect, and what surprised me was that he actually seemed hurt. He had told us earlier that day that he was going to extend some good will to us later that evening at a restaurant. Then it seemed to set in that some chump ass bitches, bitch bitch bitch (WHATTUP JOE!), weren't reciprocating.

He seemed resigned when he asked "what can I do about it?"
I told him I'd take care of it.
As an aside, I'd like to say that houston doesn't fucking play.

I gathered the evidence and headed to the restaurant where I saw the villains sitting at the opposite end of the table. I tossed the empty, rum-scented bottle on the table, and stood up to make a speech. Since the professor already knew I was going to town, he looked at me with support.

"A lot of us put a lot of work into this project, and we don't appreciate you coming to class drunk and disrespecting us while we present. I saw you laugh at one of my group members presenting, and I don't take disrespect like that. I don't get disrespected"

The queen hater stared me down, clearly stunned with disbelief. I suppose it would be the look you might give when realizing that overnight, you had been tattooed with "property of james koo" on your ass." She first denied talking during the presentations, and then denied the drinking. I suppose that's the go-to argument when caught in a lie. Her final response was that I was just bitter for not having won, since the presentations were in competition. I told her I could care less, and that it was the least of my concerns. I really wanted to put on a name tag, because I don't think she remembered who she was talking to.

The girl sitting to the side of queen hater looked like she was going to break down. I savored that moment like fucking sushi. Then again, she may have been drunk. Apparently red-head was getting heated about me. Sorry for stuntin all over you.

Anyways, the food arrived--the standard bar fair of onion rings and tater skins, and I must say, never had it tasted so victorious. They say revenge is a dish best served cold, but I'll take reheated.

Later that evening, queen hater pulled me aside (with the girl who had been sitting next to her) and said "I know it was wrong we were drinking, but don't you think it's messed up that you told the fucking professor?"
to which I replied
"No, that was mad disrespect. We busted our asses on the project, and the fact that you came to the meeting just to drink and mess around, I'm not having it." She denied even talking, which is a damn lie, and I called her out for laughing at homie. Then she dug the grave deeper:

"Tell me what YOU would have done. You just finished your presentation in the morning, wouldnt YOU have done the same thing? You present in the morning, like, wouldnt YOU have done the same thing?"

"HELL NO! At least have the discipline to wait! I wanted to get faded too, but at least I was willing to wait till later"

At this point, howard was trying to cut in and queen-hater-valley-girl-re

ject tried to push him out with the "attitude hand" (you know what I mean), and the ever classy "I AINT EVEN TALKIN TO YOU!" He then joined the conversation, and we tagged-team them like fucking the WWF.

Hater number 2 tried pulling Howard aside, reasoning with the same hollow shit. He gave her a verbal smackdown. I jumped in, and the hand came back up with another "I AINT EVEN TALKIN TO YOU." So I turned my side, and gave her the

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eQOnDItTsDA (wait for the chorus for a demonstration)

and then I did what I does.

"It doesn't even matter. I'm communicating, and you hear me. At the end of the day, I wake up as James Koo. Unfortunately, you wake up to... yourself.. and bad judgment. You're not even seeing me. you CAN'T see me."

I looked hater 2 straight in the face and said "Disrespect again. I dare you."
After that, it was "fuck this, howard, let's roll." I really DONT hold myself in high regards, but if there's something worse than shit-talking, it's arrogant shit talking.

See, I understand the code that you don't snitch. But the fact of the matter is, some folks came through thinking that they could disrespect without consequence. I don't tolerate that. I don't wake up wondering if somebody is going to make me feel like a bitch that day. It doesn't happen. The way I see it, it's just retribution. You took from all the other people in that class the respect that they deserved for the fucking work they put in (yes I AM the poeple's champ). So I took something back.

I took tonight when you sober up, tossing and turning in your bed, unable to shake the fact that I made you look like the bitch you are. I took tomorrow morning, when you wake up and question if the previous night of bitchdom REALLY took place. That'll probably mean I've taken the rest of your day, the next weekend, and in high probability, your month.

Much love to all the people supporting me.

To the haters, I must be doing something right since you exist. I see why you're mad, son. And that's the reason why tonight I'm going to sleep like a king. My comforter will never have felt so warm, and my head will ALWAYS be on the cold side of the pillow. And tomorrow, when I wake up around mid-afternoon, I'm going to look in the mirror and pick my nose. Why? Because a guy picking his nose first thing after waking up is the same guy who made you a BITCH last night. And when I step out of my apartment, I'm going to feel fresher and flyer than you EVER have, because there aint a SPECK of bitch on me.

this was the most memorable way to finish a class, ever.

Ode to Party Girl

In one of my project teams I have a party girl.
She is loud, she is short, she is a terrible driver.
She shrieks when her favorite songs come on the
radio. She doesn't know the words.
She is positive her opinion is right when it is based on
stupid. stupid. stupid things.
When I told you I had a headache from doing nothing
but reading for HOURS, you adamantly refused to turn
down the volume to that fucking baby bash song.


Constantly in my ear, harping away as if anything you have to say actually matters.
it never has. it never will.
You say the dumbest things and it makes me wonder how you haven't been hit by traffic.
Party girl, only stupid people can appreciate the things you say.
The rest of the world is indifferent to your thoughts, because... well frankly, they're worthless.
In all of your years of existence, you never stopped to understand. You realized from an early age that you exist, and that THAT is the only thing that should matter.

But reality exists around the bubble afforded by daddy's promise of a lexus.
Reality exists for people who understand that sometimes life is hard.
Your inability to work, marred by your shitty. fucking. attiude, your laziness regarding the thought process, your inability to learn ANYTHING... except how to party... these things make you a burden. a walking burden.

The density of thoughts running through your head is much like that of styrofoam. For the space you occupy, you should do better.

It will all collapse when you realize that the hands on the clock move, whether or not you do. That the sun does not rise because you want it to. That time has rotted you, both inside and out.
Maybe you will choke through the bitterness, in your old age, telling yourself that nothing is so, because you were a party girl.

study broke

I'm tired of reading about things I don't care about. I realized I retain information for a long time for things I'm interested in, such as the fact that the bear who voiced chewbacca in star wars died in the 90s or something. Or that the world's biggest diamond is floating in space (at 10 billion trillion trillion cts), not that i care much for diamonds or space exploration (whattup bryan), but that is just kinda COOoooool.

In 3 days my college experience will come to an end, as far as testing and projects and general academic BULLSHIT is concerned. The degree to which i'm thrilled is well... moderated by how tired and frustrated I am for even having to go through with all these projects. Within the next couple of days, aisde from a typical test with essay questions, I will be helping to present something like 100 pages in reports and maybe 80 slides worth of powerpoint presentations. does this come off as bitchy? do i sound like a wus?

fuck it.

I think i've out-stayed my welcome in the conservative south. I went to lunch after scott's baptism with some of his students, his pastor's family, and some of our mutual friends. I ended up in a discussion about evolutionism and creationism with the pastor, which pretty much sucked since I'm pretty sure that he'll now consider me one of scott's "bad influence" friends or something. The arguments he used to support his belief in creationism are the same that the church has been re-hashing for generations--gaps in the fossil record, the way everything is just a theory, and the general concession of evolution on a smaller scale. I wanted to go to town, but that wasn't the place nor the time.

I recently heard that agnostics are just atheists who are scared of death. I thought that was pretty accurate.

I said I'd give church a chance in LA, but not in the korean/asian-american context. The bitterness I have begun to harbor after I realized the extent to which I was endoctrin--brainwashed by the church has made it a difficult decision to even give church a second chance. or maybe God's giving me a second chance. but then we must also presuppose He exists in the manner He describes.

At the end of the day, I am terrified of being wrong.
that God DOES exist, and is who He says he is.
that there is a hell.
and that i have licked the stamp affixed to the envelope that will send me there.

I sat next to faith's cousin (think her name was Gina) at the university fashion show (BIG UPS ON THAT WIN, FAITH), and she had started our conversation by mentioning that she had seen me around church in houston. We discussed religion, and I didn't know how to respond to her optimism, her unwavering belief that indeed God will "bring me back to Him." with what confidence can she say such things? Even after 23 years of believing that I wouldn't fall as I have, I did. I tried to explain to her the science that serves as the basis of my agnosticism. I was kind of high at the time, so I don't think I communicated it as articulately as I could have. I'd like to take a brief moment to share the fact that even in my most inebriated of states, my verbal ninjitsu doesn't get any sloppier than the way most people speak sober.

I hate when they attribute my agnosticism to my age. Older people say that they all had this "phase." Assuming that this belief will at one point be terminated at some yet-to-be-determined moment in time. They assume that questioning and self-searching is simply a by-product of the college environment. I don't think it's fair to see things that way. The immediate assumption that my experience is the same as theirs is a bit immature. I know that the questions I'm asking have been asked by millions before me. I'm sure that my thoughts aren't all that original, considering the span of humanity's existence on earth. It's just that if I've learned ONE thing in the past 23 years, it's that I am different. I am markedly different from my peers. Not necessarily in any better way, but i am one eccentric asshole.

We'll see what happens in the summer. I'll stick to my word, for my mama's sake.

hello hello

I have digsby as my aim client and I run the facebook extension on firefox. When I run both, anything that happens on facebook to anyone I know immediately generates an alert for me. It's become unnecessary since I don't care about that many people, but I'm wondering if I should keep the firefox extension. It took me about 4 tries to spell "care" right just now. Digsby I'm gonna stick to for a while, since I like having all my email/chat/social shit on one program.


Now that my Shure E2C's are on their way out (2nd pair, RIP), I'm leaning towards the Etymotic Research ER6i's as a replacement. Honestly, as incredible as the shures sound, I'm very skeptical about the quality of their construction. I've had 2 sets fall apart, I have a friend whose e2cs stopped working in a similar manner, and teh intarnets pretty much says they're prone to falling apart.

I got lunch with the girl from the previous post today. I still felt kinda like a bitch. it was a confusing moment of bitchdom and fun.

Harold and Kumar 2 is coming out. I need to watch that. Before I can, I have to finish up this fucking avalanche of school work I have before me. Projects, Tests, Projects.. it's enough to drive a grown man crazy.